Not that I ever wanted to become an expert in the world of dating widows, but I feel like I have now had enough dating experience to be able to impart a certain wisdom to those lucky enough to discover the joys of dating a widow/widower. We have been to hell and back and have great gifts to share if you are willing to venture down the road with us. I suspect many more dating tips will come to light in the comments of this post, as there is a great deal of wisdom to be found amongst my readers.
1. Don’t ask how our spouse died. You might not be ready for the answer. If we want to tell you, we will when the time is right.
2. Be interested in our kids. Bonus points if you ask to see pictures
3. Keep the sad puppy face short when you find out we’re widowed. Just say something like “I’m sorry” and then let us set the tone for what follows.
4. If you don’t think you will be able to handle the widowed/kid thing, then end it early.
5. If you do end it, don’t use our dead spouse as your excuse (ie. “I think you are still in love with your husband/wife”)
6. Allow us to talk about our husband/wife, and don’t feel threatened. He/she is dead after all. It’s no different than you talking about your ex.
7. Don’t get all sympathetic about our widowhood and use it as an excuse to hold hands on the first date. (caveat: A widower may like this)
8. Make us laugh. We will love you for it. We are tired of crying.
9. Be yourself and let us be ourselves.
10. Most of us know what a great marriage looks and feels like. If you are willing that is what we have to offer you.