Getting Mom-ish

There were a bunch of girls here the other night for a sleepover. At 10:30pm, they decided to head out to a park nearby and a little later I “serendipitously” drove by and found them surrounded by a bunch of boys. This was a first for us, and I knew it was not something that my own child had initiated. I wished for Arron at that moment, almost laughing at the thought of him stepping into his “Mr. Bigpants” role and swaggering down the street to show a bunch of teen aged boys who was really in charge. It would have been his dream moment.

Half an hour after my drive-by, and a text to Olivia reminding her of her 11:30 curfew, they arrived back at the house, but I soon discovered that two were missing. I had a few panicked moments imaging myself dashing around the neighbourhood in the rain, calling parents. Then one arrived, followed a few minutes later by the other, followed by… a boy. The girl stepped through the door as I stood there, and the boy tried to do the same.

“Oh! You’re coming in are you?” I said. We had a few awkward moments where we both hesitated wondering what to do. And then I called it. “I think this is a girl party,” I said. “But thanks for walking the girls home.” I got really mom-ish when I said “You know how to get home from here, right?”

I was surprised to not be caring if Olivia was embarrassed or if her friend was mad. I knew I had done the right “mom” thing.

Having teenagers is complicated – like an ongoing game of Scruples. These tests of mom-ness certainly do teach us who we are as parents, and as humans.

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  1. Cathy October 25, 2010 at 2:36 pm

    HA! good job Abby. You are the kind of parent with follow-through and morals that I would want my kids friends to have. (we have a couple of years here..)

  2. Rachelle October 25, 2010 at 5:22 pm

    Very inspiring thank you for posting. I’ll need your number on speed dial in a few years please.

  3. diane f October 27, 2010 at 12:21 pm

    I always felt it was better to have a mixed group in the back yard, or house then to have my kids sneaking around at the park or somewhere else….which “will” happen if kids get to be this age and they are still splitting off …girls here, boys there…(for the sake of parental comfort). 🙂

  4. Carolyn Stephens November 4, 2010 at 6:04 pm

    perfect. Not bitchy, not a pushover. Friendly, and just firm enough to make it a done deal.

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