20 Years

Its strange to think I might have been celebrating a 20th wedding anniversary tomorrow. There is a part of me that wonders if there is not some version of me, of Arron living in a parallel universe where he didn't die, the world didn't shift upon its axis. I wonder what that life would have been like? I wonder how different our kids might be. How different I might be.As often happens I had a conflict yesterday where I had to get Olivia to one place and be at another place with Carter at the same time. And for the first time in ages, the idea that Arron might have been around, so we could divide and conquer struck me. I'm sure there have been plenty of opportunities for this thought to enter my mind, but for some reason it only did yesterday.As for the day itself, I have no idea what I'll do. There seem to be an inordinate number of days in my year that I have no idea how to celebrate. I guess because they are not exactly celebratory.Perhaps another Arron poem will cheer me. Its good to hear his voice. Might be interesting to read it while listening to this:

Delta WingSunlight streakedfrom your glistening lipsa place far and beyondthe wind blew you through some coastal placedown the driveover that clumsy wall by the house withthe pigs and chickensonto the narrow beachand soon that swift, dry, uncaring climbup the sandy cliff face onto the palapaso I turned from the kitchenwhere salsa I stirredon that brown cracked tileso Mexican-minethe salsa was readythe oysters were headyand the half shellwhere seduction next to me came as your longhair blew in silent, salted ocean breezeswas a rough place to take ourselvesbut Thelonious playedand Body + Soulchords were struck